Haiz, pay day today supposed to be happy de.... But, after minus credit card bills, insurance, membership fees, donations, mum's allowance etc. My whole pay gone le. Sob sob. If not for the bonus this Fri, I this mth cfm is eat air liao. Haiz, sad ah, really overspend too much liao, even dug into my savings a/c last mth. Sob sob, like tt how to get married??? *cry loud loud*

Was emailing with Kris, one of my best gal fren just now and mentioned engagement. What she felt was, nowadays few ppl do tt le, straight away ROM liao. Then she say I still young, cfm will be with my bf forever meh, nth is definite and impossible in this world liao. My reply was, at least up till now, I still think he is the one for me (after 2yrs 5 mths and 4 days). Haha... But ya loh, engagement like really an extra step leh. Then no $$$ also. As long as we love each other and ppl know we together, gd enuff le lah.

Ytd, me and Hubby saw the Felin's magnetic rings (forgot the name for it liao). So pretty and nice and now its cheaper le compared to last time. Then Hubby say, next time when his fren ard then we come and look again. Hmmm, is he hinting something? Wahaha, think too much liao. *kok my head* Anyway, its not a must have lah, more of a luxury.

Gonna stay back a while to do the banner after work, then meet Kris and Hubby for dinner. Hehe, Kris also says we 2 like inseparable. Feel that after 5 wks apart, Hubby seem to be more caring towards me le, haha. Then nowadays we seldom quarrel le, compared to b4. But I still angry with him over last nite's waffle! Hmph... Me want waffle, he dun let me eat. Hmph... Must be hiam me too fat le. *angry angry angry* *bish*

Gonna be busy today, so take a bit of time to blog. Sigh, my laptop clock is not working properly, which is why my blog appears to be posted later than Hubby's blog. Sob sob.

Have a meeting later in the afternoon from 1-5pm. Tmr might be gog for a pte sale with Meilin and Charlene. Wednesday rush home to watch SG Idol! (Syl rocks!!!) Thursday nth on at the moment, probably do the banner for D&G, 2 more wks left only, gotta hurry! Friday is Bonus Day!! Yeah!! *jumps and hops ard* Hope it'll be gd, but then again, how much extra is based on my performance appraisal, so hope for the best bah.

Alrite, gotta get back to work. Lots of work waiting for me. Sigh... Blues blues blues....

Kindda feeling a little down, chatting with Hubby on MSN. When I told him I was feeling down and thinking abt some stuff, he called me immediately. Really touched, but I didn't feel like talking abt it. So chose to blog instead.

Not too sure what's the prob too. I kindda feel depressed and pessimistic abt our future. Before he was back, I wish we had all the time together, made lotsa dreams and kept planning abt our future. I love him, I know I do... But somehow, now I kindda start wondering if its meant to be. I start worrying that we won't have enough money to buy our flat, that my mum will object to us, that his family will not be able to accept my past. He seems to take everything so easily, like there's nth to worry abt. I feel like I'm the only one worried and planning for our future. I feel so alone, so cold, so empty. I feel like crying my heart out, but yet act strong for him. So many times I have been hurt by others' comments, I should have been numb by now. but no, it still hurts. It still gets me worried.
I know I'm not the soft, gentle gal he might want, I know I'm fierce and rough. But that's the way I am and I won't be any happier if I changed. Isn't he supposed to love me the way I am? If that is so, why do ppl keep 'threatening' me? Saying if I'm not gentle to him, I'll scare him off or he'll leave me eventually? I act like I don't care, but I do. I'm afriad, but I pretend to be 'bo chup' in front of them. I really dunno, I'm losing faith and confidence in myself. I'm so lost...

hey my beloved wifey galgal.. told her not to worry too much.. thinking too much won't solve anything but give self stress and more white hair right? all these worries about money, flat and family.. everything is still in the infant stage, it may seem very hard to achieve now.. but remember we've got a 3 yrs plan? 1st step to everything is always hard right? but as long as we are working towards it, we will most definitely be rewarded with what we want.. so don't worry and let's look forward to our future wor.. *muackz*
As for the '三八s', really, unless we can stitch up their mouths, there's nothing we can do to what they want to say. but what i really observe is.. they are just plain jealous of how loving and close we are.. keke. either they couldn't get the same treatment from their partners or they are deprived, so they brand us as some 'alien criminals' to comfort themselves lo.
So wifey, don't worry ok? work with me towards our future and be assured i love u dearly every single moment *hughug/8

Legs almost breaking le. Went out with Hubby today to go shopping! Had lunch first at Sakae Sushi at Bugis, then went to Dorothy Perkins to shop. Saw a nice skirt, but didn't see the top I liked, so didn't buy it cos I needed to make up $80 to use my voucher. The staff's attitude kindda pissed me off too. Went to Peninsula Plaza to buy Hubby's shoes, his shoes really worn out le. Got it finally at a shop, New Balance, cost $130. Ex sia. But since its comfy, well, tt's more impt. Hehe.. =)

Went to Suntec City after that and managed to find both the skirt and top I wanted. But the skirt, they didn't have my size. Checked with the Bugis branch, they still have it, so decided to take the skirt back for exchange. Before that, went shopping with Hubby at Topman first. I kindda like the white shirt he tried on, but no more size leh.In the end, bought a long sleeve brown shirt, he looked so smart and sexy! Hehe....

After that headed back to Bugis to change my skirt and well, tt damn bitch's attitude still pissed me off. Kaoz, felt like giving her 1 tight slap. Went for dinner at this "Gao Ji", nice food!!! So yummy, hehe. After a gd meal, went to OG to walk walk a while before taking bus back home.

Overall, a gd day and lotsa money spent, haha. =p

Had to do a MINDEF job in the morning.. not surprisingly because of SAF's ignorance with proper house-keeping and equipment.. I have to work with 1-inch thick dust and sweat dripping off my head.. this will be the last time i will take up this job! would rather catch up on my rest on my lazy sat.
Went shopping in the afternoon with galgal.. now as tired as galgal.. and sleepy too.. *yawn*

*love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal love galgal*
29 months of loving and yet more to come hehee.. *carry up galgal and spin around*

Ytd and today is a special day to me. 25th Nov, the day I joined my company 2 yrs ago. Today is me and Hubby's 29th month Anniversary. Wah, think back really time flies. Hehe, first time got r/s that last so long also. =p

Been quite busy today. Had a long meeting in the morning with the D&G committee to discuss abt the proposal. Prizes almost settled, banner not really finished yet. Phew, so many things to do wor. Then mth end sales closing coming soon. Will be busy le for the next few weeks. Have already settled the gift for X'mas office gift exchange, so less 1 thing to do. My leave also approved le for 17th Dec (D&G actual day), hehe.

Hope Hubby can get leave also. Anyway, see how it goes lah.

Hubby, love ya always, may we have many more yrs ahead. ~_^

Its so terribly cold today, brrr. Wear cardigan le still freezing, buai tahan. I can finally access my email today le! BUT... all my received/sent emails before 22/Nov all gone. Sigh... Even my sub-folders, stationery and signature also gone. *sob sob* Gotta wait for the Notes Administrator to retreive the database for me I think, so ma fan. Haiz, so inconvenient also.

Kindda sian actually. Today gog KTV, cos Jolene treat us (her b-day coming). But Hubby might not be able to make it, Charlene got work to clear, maybe cannot also, Grace not feeling well, maybe not gog also. Like that left only me, Jolene and Meilin. Haiz, why like that de.

See how it goes bah, think Hubby cannot make it le. Dunno what time he finish and where he will finish work. By the time he come down, I maybe gog home le, so no pt he come down also. I know I kindda sticky to him recently. But so many days apart, I just can't help it, cannot get enough of him also. 24 hours is not enough for me anymore...

Such a lovely day yesterday.. galgal took a half day leave and we never waste a sec of it.. had lunch at 'blanco court prawn mee' which is near her office and then went home for some quality 'private intimate sessions' which we missed so much during my absence.. the day ended with playin pool and dinner at marine parade.. wish the day hadn't ended so fast and I don't have to go back to work today.. haha

Sigh, my email has been down since noon ytd (office one I mean). Seems that its corrupted or something to do with the database. Many ppl have told me all their emails to me have bounced back. Sob sob. Without email, I have to do manual fax and call them also, so ma fan. Sianz...

Heng, I'm on half day leave today, if not no email really difficult to work with. Hehe, later meeting Hubby for lunch then probably go his place bah. Spend some quality time together before he start work tmr. Dunno is Hubby grow taller le or I become shorter, last time Hubby put his hand ard my shouder, he feel uncomfy cos he say I too tall, but its just nice wor. Me so short lah actually, only 165, Hubby 172. Anyway, feels comfy and gd to be in his arms again, hehe. 1hr 40mins more before meeting Hubby, yeah! =)

Whole body so sore and aching now, sigh... Hate that time of the month...

yup yup, daddy is back!! 34 days is a darn long period but Aust is a nice place to be in for stress release.. I wouldn't even mind missing 2 public holidays but because of my galgal.. I really wish there wouldn't be another similiar thing again in the future. The days apart really tested our r'ship, how we know how much we loved and missed each other so much.. Galgal really did a great job in the webpage overhaul! I love you galgal and you are always in my heart no matter how far and for how long we are apart.. *MUACKZ & carry galgal spin around*

YEAH!!! Hubby is back le, hehe. *hops ard* Sunday morning received called from Hubby saying that he's already at the airport, taking 2pm flight back to SG. Hehe, 1 day earlier wor, so happy!! That was ard 11am, from then on, time seemed to pass so slowly. Hubby said, he will reach SG ard 7-8pm. So after late lunch ard 3-4pm, I started preparing loh, took bath, do mask, apply some radiant youth essence, hehe... Must look my best mah. *blush*

Went out ard 6.30pm, but missed the bus, next bus came ard 6.50pm, so I reached airport ard 7.15pm. Went to check the arrival time, it was 7.47pm. So I kindda walked ard a bit, nearly got lost again... =x Then 7.47pm finally came, but not landed yet, sob sob. Waited till almost 8.10pm then it showed landed. By the time Hubby came out was almost 9pm le, so long! Legs almost breaking le from all the standing. Was so excited and happy to see him. Hehe, Hubby become so tanned le (heartpain...), Mummy say he grow a bit fatter le, but to me no leh. Haha, no matter what, still love him all the same. Now Hubby look so manly to me, haha. =p

Anyway, finally got to hug him after so long, hehe, feels so gd and comfy. Hubby said I slimmed down le, hehe, so happy. Hope he likes it bah. Have to jia you and slim down more! Will be meeting Hubby tonite for dinner, gotta start thinking what to eat le!

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly, madly, deeply do

I will be strong I will be faithful 'cause I'm counting on
A new beginning
A reason for living
A deeper meaning, yeah

[chorus]
I want to stand with you on a mountain
I want to bathe with you in the sea
I want to lay like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me

And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry
The tears of joy for all the pleasure in the certainty
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of
The highest powers
In lonely hours
The tears devour you

[chorus]
Oh can you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'Cause it's standing right before you
All that you need will surely come

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly, madly, deeply do

[chorus]
I want to stand with you on a mountain
I want to bathe with you in the sea
I want to live like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me

Sigh, after work today, forgot to take my jacket home to wash. Then happily went to Bugis to trim eyebrows leh then remember. Kaoz, so pissed off. Took dinner alone as usual at Yoshinoya, tried the Kakiage value meal, ok loh, nth fantastic, kindda ex leh for what u get.

Kindda lost my way while figuring how to get back to office from Bugis... I know how to go to Bugis from office, but dunno hw to go back... =x Anyway, finally, I walked all the way back to office, sianz, legs breaking. Go back le, took jacket le, decided to grab a cab home so i will be in time for SG Idol. Waited for 30mins, bo cab, kaoz. In the end, called cab, waste $ again. =x

Reached home and watch SG Idol, phew Sylvester is in the Grand Finals!! Wahaha.. So happy!! msg my bf, Grace, Jolene and Uncle Jeff to tell them abt it. LOL... So excited sia. Honestly ah, though Olinda's voice powerful, but I seriously don't like her and relate to her. So many ppl cried for her, wp, even my mum cried. Pengz... Anyway, after that went to sleep for a while and woke up ard midnight. Logged on to #Spinx and tuned in also, kindda quiet for a Fri night.

I was planning to go TM buy stuff and do my manicure actually later in the day. But since I got dentist appt at 6pm ard my place, lazy and sianz to rush here and there, maybe Sun then go bah. Starting to put more effort and prepare to look my best for Hubby on Monday, 2 more days to go only. A bit gan chiong and worried abt how he'll react when he see me after 35 days apart, haha. K, I worry too much I know, I can't help it... Hope he likes it bah. Miss him so much. Love u, Hubby. You're the best~ *muacks*

Yeah~ Weekend is coming, last working day and 3 more days before he's back.

Went to buy materials with Sharon and Brenda on Wednesday for the banner. Found the organza we wanted at Arab Street and bought the materials (sequins, gold glitter spray, styrofoam etc) at Bras Brasah. After that, Sharon headed home, Brenda headed for her yoga class and I walked to Bugis to have dinner and took a bus home.

Thursday had meeting with the D&G committee to update each other of the progress, what's to be done etc. Basically, settled most things, just left the wine/corkage (argh, I spelled cockage juz now, what am I thinking of?!?!) charges and the prizes to be settled and of cos the banner. Lots of manual work work to be done for the banner, sewing, cutting etc. Oh ya, the invitation cards too!

Just now after lunch, we went to look for the table's centre piece and found some really nice ones. Got to check with Hubby if he has any tealights to spare me so we can save cost on that. Anyway, so far so gd, hope I can strike 1st prize! Wahaha... We will not be having door gifts this time round, but instead a sure-win lucky draw prize for everyone! Hehe. Hope everything will go smoothly bah, gd luck to myself~ =P Next wk onwards will be busy le with Hubby coming back, mth end sales closing and D&G date drawing nearer, phew. Ok, will update again when I got the chance bah!

Was supposed to go Expo ytd, but cos I was all alone, so kindda sian to go so far. I took shuttle bus from office to Raffles City and since I passed by Robinsons, went in to take a look. Saw L'oreal hair dye selling at $9.90 only, so bought a box for my mummy. Wanted to buy for Hubby too, but dunno if he'll prefer red or brown base this time. Moreover, so long nvr see him le, dunno he tanned le or still fair also.

Then went to skincare corner... *drumroll* BIO-ESSENCE!! Hehe, 3 whole shelves of pdts sia. Lol... Could not resist and bought the cleanser ($10.10), eye revitalizing cream and radiant youth essence (packaged together for only $38!!!). Hehe, then the promoter gave me a sample of the cleanser which I passed to Charlene to try. The promoter actually said if I buy 2 sets of the package, I can get a whole box of masks free, but think think dun want lah. Very broke le.

After shopping, went to Crepes & Cream at Citylink to have dinner ALONE. Sigh, kindda getting a bit sick of this kind of life. Shop alone, eat alone, sleep alone, cry alone... Sob sob... Ordered "Rodeo Style" which is actually crepe with fillings of beef and veggie and a sunny side-up. After dinner, went back home ALONE. Argh, sianz ah. Reach home le, mummy nag say why buy so many things lah, dressing table already so full lah etc. But I already bought, she also LL lah... Haha.. =p Had a little 'quarrel' with Hubby when I was on the train, he also said why I spend money on all these. Sob sob. Me wanna look younger and better for him mah, already 22 le leh, wait become old and ugly, he dump me how? Chou nan ren! Hmph.

This morning when I was on the way to work, he called me up and coax me. Say simi, I love u lah, I miss u lah, kaoz... Told him, u always like thatt one, make me angry le, then come coax me, hmph. But though I was saying him, but still grinning lah, haha... Anyway, discussed with him le, I will be taking afternoon on 23rd to accompany him. 5 more days to go leh, a bit anxious and excited bah, haha. Die, juz remembered I forgot to take leave for 17/Dec also.

Still in time to take bah, k lah, shall end my long story here, hehe.

Been busy this morning from the moment I switched on my PC at work. Phew, long weekend means lots of follow-up to do too. But well, I should be glad that at least I got a job bah. Gog crazy le, so many systems things I not very familar with. Take the opportunity to learn bah, its an adv to me afterall, especially now that a lot of companies want people who have SAP system experience.

I'm glad that so far I like my job despite the scoldings I get often. =( But well, its still my interest. Count count, this mth 25th will be my 2nd yr working here le. Time really flies, this is my first job after graduating from TP. Suddenly start to feel old le, haiz, already 22 le. Have many plans/dreams for the future, but the major problem is $$$. I wish I could do my degree, wish I can learn driving (but everyone else objects, =x), buy a flat, buying a car will be a bonus. Last but not least, of cos get married lah, haha. Provided got ppl want me lah. =p

Hehe, when I was younger, I used to dream of the ideal wedding, you know those with lotsa glamour in a posh hotel etc, haha. Now that I'm old le, can ROM already not bad le, haha. Got to be realistic, the money saved on dinner etc, I rather spend on my honeymoon, flat, deco etc. I kindda started having this thinking 1 yr back: What for spend so much money to entertain others, make urself grin/smile/laugh like crazy and at the end of it, u might not even enjoy urself? Which was why I decided to for a holiday with my bf for my 21st b-day last yr instead of a chalet celebration. Haha, I must be nuts. But well, I do it my way and I'm happy. =)

Went to John Little warehouse sale with Charlene on Sat, there got free Bio-essence facial wor. Haha, so we 2 went for it loh, then also bought some of e pdts. Not too bad actually, but if buy e entire series, damn ex loh. Me not so rich.. =x

We shopped for 3 whole hrs sia, and 3/4 of the time stuck at lingerie corner, lol. Bougt a bra and panty set each for mummy and sis. Then bought a purple and white translucent one for myself, wahaha... *blush* Then bought some sexy G-strings also, lol. Then bought a cute, sweet set of top and shorts.

Sunday kinnda nua at home the whole day, watch TV and sleep nia. Today dunno wanna go out or not, a bit lazy, but dun wanna waste the day at home, haiz, see how bah.

Have not updated this blog for couple of days le, been kindda busy. Tuesday went to The Legends to see the ballroom. Not bad actually, quite a nice, quiet place, newly renovated. Discussed abt the stage, deco, arrangement etc. Quite a fruitful trip I would say.

Wednesday, we had a cross-dept pre-holiday celebration gathering. Went with Grace, Brenda Yew, Fanny and Jasmine, didn't know most of the salesmen and mgrs from the other depts. They were kindda surprised when they know that there were 2 Brenda, haha. Drank quite a bit I would say and a shot of tequila, sang KTV too. Phew, "ta" a bit also. Normally, drink 2 mugs of beer, I will seh le. Was kindda really high and seh when I went back, haha. Went home and mummy asked if I drank, then I say no. =x But think she din believe lah, cos she say got smell, my face red red and I was drowsy. Lucky nvr get scolding. Hehe... =p

Thursday, whole day at home, watch TV and sleep whole day, haha. Lucky no hangover from the previous night's drinking.

And well, today is Friday, but no mood to work, sob sob. Anyway, lunch time now liao! Hehe... Me go eat le, so hungry~

Kindda feeling a bit down today. Its like, you have done ur part le and some areas are not within my scope. But yet, ppl don't appreciate ur effort and only make critism etc. It makes u feel that all ur effort have gone to waste. Worst thing is, after settling everything, email not even sent out, they already telling you they not going.

Of cos ppl will make comparisons between this yr's D&G and last yr, this is inevitable. But at the very least, I would appreciate a bit of encouragement and not just snide remarks etc. Of cos, if I settled for a lower budget with the same event company last year, we will save more money. but then again, it might be the same old thing all over again. In this case, what's the point of sourcing for another event company in the first place and changing the committee?

Sigh, really feeling depressed now and dunno what to say liao. Can't be bothered to defend myself and the committee liao.

Sigh, Sat is supposed to be fun, enjoyable etc. But not for me today. Supposed to bring my sis out then she last min say dun wanna go and show black face to me, ask her qn, dun wanna ans me, kaoz. Then my mum still side her, so fed up.

Went out of the hse filling so pissed off that I felt like smoking. But in the end I didn't, cos I already quit 2 yrs plus le for Hubby, somemore now cigs so ex... =x Anyway, took 518 go Orchard, dropped at Far East Plaza to have lunch. Went to eat the boneless chicken rice, kindda sad. It used to be alrite for me even if I was alone and went out the whole day when I was single. But now, its a torture and painful reminder that he's not by my side. As I ate, I was reminded of the times we ate together there, we would always order the chicken rice, veggie and salted veggie with duck soup.

After lunch, I walked down to Wisma. As I was walking, I noticed there were so many couples ard. Made me feel so out of place. Sms Hubby and told him I felt so alone and empty without him ard. I know I was so whiney, but I just can't help it. I felt so down and felt like crying, everything/place reminded me of our times together. Holding hands, hugging, shopping, chatting and laughing together. Even our quarrels became memorable. I also realised from the time Hubby left, we never quarrelled once which is really a miracle...

Walked ard Wisma and Taka, then walked to Borders. Nothing much there and couldn't find the thing I want. Walked back to Orchard MRT to go Dhoby Ghuat. Ended up, I got down 1 stop earlier and ended up at Somerset, kaoz. Waited for the next train, made sure it was the right stop, got down. Then, problem... I lost my way in the station! After 10 mins, finally foudn my way out to PS. Duhz... Anyway, shopped ard PS, got my things and went to the bus-stop to wait for bus home. The stupid bus came 30 mins later, way later than the org sch. Kaoz...

Not a very gd day, but felt better after toking to Hubby. Sigh, hope tmr will be better bah. Hubby, miss u dearly, love u always, u're in my heart...

Today is a busy day. Came in late! Well, was heading to work then tummy ache, sob sob. By the time I reached office was 8.45am le (work starts at 8.30am).

Settled a issue that was dragging for 3 days le, phew. Been calling and emailing the haulier so many times, but they always say they're busy, they'll call/email back. But they did none of it, kaoz. Anyway, finally one of the staff stationed at fty's warehouse finally got back to me.

Ytd officially take on the new customer, starting to follow up on shpmt. Still a bit lost and trying to absorb whatever I can basically. Back-end documents wise, I'm not so worried cos its similar to my flow-thru biz. This new biz is 'A-Z' biz, so contact quite a lot of parties, guess I'll be quite busy for the next few weeks.

Sent a few emails ytd to some entertainment companies. Only 3 revert, 1 said it was taken up on that date, another said our budget too low, 3rd one we might be considering. It had a nice proposal and fitted within our budget. TinTed, thks for your help. I contacted Water Tay le, but he's too ex liao. He say my budget not even enough for his emcee fees, sob sob.

Haiz, bo bian, everything must budget mah. Later will have a meeting at 2pm for a short discussion for D&G. Wish me gd luck bah!
Tonight got SG Idol, after work must rush home to watch le. Sylvester, jia you!! Hehe...

Sick today, on MC. Had a terrible headache ard 4+am, woke up to take panadol. Went back to sleep, but had fever, whole night feel hot and cold, on and off. Morning woke up still feeling terrible, so didn't go to work.

Woke up ard 12+pm, on my PC to delete some unwanted documents. Then tunied into Spinx and logged into IRC. Still feeling a bit giddy, but better le. Sigh, miss Hubby so much. Today is the 13th day le, 22 more days to go. Can't wait for him to be back soon.